This is one of my new favorite paintings and I want to try and explain my sacred and personal thoughts behind it. I envisioned this painting back during Easter. Demitri was learning to sleep all the way through the night still and that is always so difficult for me personally because I just want to snuggle tiny baby rolls at all hours. You would think it would be easy and I would rejoice at the opportunity to sleep all night, but those are the longest nights where I find myself pacing until I am accidentally running because of the ache for my child. Little does Demitri know even though I am not next to him to insert the pacifier and comfort him I am as close as I have ever been in spirit and heart. I remembered thinking to myself, "how will I ever do this?" It took a while to realize that I was so focused on the scene before me that I did not realize that I am often the one inside of the "egg" in which needs to learn how to do things without direct step by step instructions from Heavenly Father. And these experiences helped me to better understand his love and mercy that even when I don't feel his presences He is still near. That is why there is a cracked egg in which the viewer is supposed to be looking out of towards their own loving Heavenly Parents.
One of my favorite speeches by Elder Holland is one about the atonement and it had extra meaning to me last Easter as I was pondering these thoughts. This is the talk and a video of him speaking which I would encourage you to watch if you are interested, but here also is a shortened video of the talk if you prefer.
I don't mean to say I understand completely or to demean the Atonement in any manner, but I feel like because of the blessing of being a parent and having to learn to let children grow from independence and indeed sometimes pain I better understand how a perfect loving Father could let our Savior be crucified on the cross and for a moment allow Him to suffer it completely alone and yet never be closer to his beloved Son.
This is the section in which helped me:
“My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” 16. .... Indeed, it is my personal belief that in all of Christ’s mortal ministry the Father may never have been closer to His Son than in these agonizing final moments of suffering. Nevertheless, that the supreme sacrifice of His Son might be as complete as it was voluntary and solitary, the Father briefly withdrew from Jesus the comfort of His Spirit, the support of His personal presence. It was required, indeed it was central to the significance of the Atonement, that this perfect Son who had never spoken ill nor done wrong nor touched an unclean thing had to know how the rest of humankind—us, all of us—would feel when we did commit such sins. For His Atonement to be infinite and eternal, He had to feel what it was like to die not only physically but spiritually, to sense what it was like to have the divine Spirit withdraw, leaving one feeling totally, abjectly, hopelessly alone."
Elder Jeffery R. Holland
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